how far out are you man? i'm pretty far out! that's pretty far out man!

oh there are so many Things to Say.

thank you for all the nice Things that everyone has Said about the empire and our aria adventures. i am excited to have a pointy award for producering (to share with hobobro) and not just musicing. it is nice to try something totally different to what we got famous for in the first place and have people still like it, since it is in my experience that people really hate change. then again, like i read on the alfie-laine.net forums, at least i am not trying to act. seriously guys i can't act i'm fucking terrible why would i ever do that. the only reason i am in the credits of he's just not that into you is because i acted in the way that I NEVER HAD TO BE ON CAMERA. anyway, thanks for buying tons of the poker face single because it sounds DIRTY.

i really missed being on hamish and andy for pants off friday. doing a radio show in your boxers is kinda of awesome you guys.

also thank you for Saying nice Things about the new album. i went into the music emporium closest to our house in LA and bought 50 copies. not even lying. it was really weird walking into a store that had my face all over the walls and buying my own album. the girl at the counter looked terrified. i'm sorry, angela. (it said that on your name badge i'm not creepy. it is a nice name!)

as i am sure everyone knows the resistour is beginning on the 4th of december, just a week awaaaay. we'll be flying into the uk early to get the kids settled. i am not sure if i'm looking forward to touring with three kids or not. i mean, i could tour with jarrod for months, he is a chill dude. it is anita griffin and katie laine i am worried about. they are some sassy midgets, you guys. it terrifies me every single day. so badly, in fact, that when i turned around and katie was standing up hanging onto the coffee table for dear life, going ^_^ at me, i may have overreacted slightly and yelled out for jules to come and see how his daughter was RUINING MY LIFE BY GROWING UP. STOP IT. then i took pictures for an hour. then i took pictures of jarrod for an hour. and then both together. and then i took pictures of clover & bowser because boo wouldn't come near me. at least we have our epic childcare provider luke hagen. and before anybody asks because i know everyone will I KNEW LUKE BEFORE KHERI KNEW BECKY. WE ARE BROS.

a Thing To Know: please stop emailing hot rod about single releases and videos because he gets very crotchety when his email inbox is over 500. nobody likes grumpy hot rod. the new single will be undisclosed desires. yes it is a sexy song about my husband and please can nobody say nasty things about it on the internet, because that makes me sad.

if you will excuse me, internets, i have to go stop my father from forcing my 9 month old daughter to hold a rock band microphone with my 6 month old son holding rock band drum sticks and my 2 month old nephew laying next to a plastic guitar hero controller, for photos he can default on facebook.

the monster's gone, he's on the run

even as my previous and still current fambily changes and depletes, my new fambily grows.
is is eighty-three days until our daughter is supposed to be here.
it is one hundred and thirty eight days until our son is supposed to be here.
it is three hundred and eleven days until the japanese tea garden, and silver and green-yellow chartreuse and tokyo purple, nieces with parasols and tiaras and my clean-shaven brother and hot rod. sorry, beards, i love you but you aren't welcome in the photos.

a change is not as good as a holiday. it was almost a holiday, and it's almost over.
time for snow and cold and my guitars and a new coat. i am told to skip dior and go for burberry.
i hope my ladies are not chipped. i miss my brothaman.
thanks for not posting on my facebook wall asking about the state of my aliveness anymore, mum. thanks for never staying on the phone longer than ten minutes anymore. oh wait, no thanks.
thanks for sending me some really psychedelic coloured three-page long emails, dad. thanks for using them instead of phones because "the interwebs are cheaper". you're really weird. i love you.

countupdowns

two thousand, eight hundred and seventy eight days since.
mine for twenty five days.
day sixteen of twenty.
it's been two days too many.
fifteen weeks and three days.
seven months, four weeks and one day.

uncle alfie never gets tired.

she really did! that's how I got called bug!

baby Eclair, you are the cutest thing I have ever seen even though you were bright red for a while there and your head was all squished. your uncle frog and I hope that you love your tiny Baby Dior presents when you are old enough to know what words are and stuff. I will take you to the zoo.

xox